These sentences are taken randomly from SECOND SOUL -- feel free to lash me if anything is crazy. Here goes:
- Not even close.
- He knew.
- The door quaked.
- It crashed shut with a loud bang, and I stumbled back, lost my footing, and fell to the floor.
- The path itself was concrete, lacking all the grandeur and particularity of the other two paths, and I found myself searching for a way out of this lost land.
Basic (but could be tightened):
- They rested there like birds in a nest, delicate and peaceful.
- The final bolt hit in the center of the table.
I find that all too often long sentences lose me about 2/3rds through, yet when well done they are so beautiful to read. Snappy sentences increase the tension, but they can also slow the flow. It is suchy a tricky thing. And I often notice that writers switch between the two without having basic sentences mixed in to keep the pace going. (You can't see me, but I'm raising my hand right now. )
So tell me, do you struggle with one or the other, both? Feel free to chime in or give advice on how to correct the SW syndrome.